This is a short interview styled post about how I lost my virginity. By sharing this, I hope that I can provide guidance to anyone that may feel stuck between a rock and a hard place. I want you as the reader to learn from my mistakes and to hopefully make better decisions than I did. Feel free to ask me any further questions. You can email me privately or leave it in the comments section. I’m an open book and I do not mind further sharing about my experience.
1. How old were you when you lost your virginity?
I was 19… He was 22.
2.Who did you give it to?
This guy I had been seeing for about 3 almost 4 months.
3.How did you feel?
I was definitely nervous, and scared. I felt like I trusted him and at the time, I thought that we were going to be together. Looking back now, I can say that I was naive about the whole situation.
4.Do you regret it?
No. Im a firm believer in the motto: everything happens for a reason. It was definitely a lesson learned but I do not regret it, it’s what I wanted at the time.
5.What was your experience like?
It hurt so bad. I couldn’t understand what the hype behind sex was because it was so uncomfortable and I had this feeling the whole time like I had to fart haha thankfully I didn’t. But farting would’ve been less embarrassing than what actually happened.
6.What happened that was so embarrassing?
I bled a lot. My period was scheduled to come in 10 days but I guess having sex, especially for the first time, made it come down early. I was so mortified and embarrassed but he made me feel better by telling me to not let something that’s natural get me upset. He was actually really sweet about the whole thing.
7.What’s your current status with the guy?
After we had sex he started to drift away and it made me feel really horrible about myself and I tried to understand what was going on and he later went on to call me clingy and saying that I was taking things too seriously as if we were in a relationship. Of course I didn’t think I was becoming clingy, I just really wanted to see where we stood and I guess he wasn’t ready to talk about that (which was ridiculous…I literally gave him my virginity!), so I just fell back and didn’t attempt to contact him and he didn’t attempt to contact me either so about a month went by and he finally came around and said something to me, as if we were just casual friends and nothing happened.
8.How did that make you feel?
I’m not one to hold a grudge for long. A month went by and I already moved on, of course I had days where I missed how things used to be and it was super hard to keep my pride and not tell him how I really felt, but it was obvious he moved on and he wasn’t thinking about me the way I was thinking about him.
9.Are you in a new relationship?
I don’t believe I’m the type of person who will ever be in a relationship because I think I’m one of those people who are meant to be alone. I honestly do not believe that there’s a “someone for everyone”. So to answer your question, no, I’m not in a relationship. Although I still do go on dates and have “special” friendships with guys haha.
10. What’s a lesson you want your readers to be able to take from this?
Know your worth. Know that you are more valuable than you think. Know that especially as a woman you are in comeplete control of your body. And to never feel obligated to do anything that you don’t feel 100% comfortable doing. If you have to question it or talk yourself into something, then chances are, you shouldn’t do it.